I’d Rather Have A Crush On You Forever

Well damn. am I a coward for actually admitting this as my truth?

Thought Catalog

Hey, you. Here’s the deal. I kinda like you, like a little itty bit. You don’t know about it yet, and you probably never will, because I have no intention of spilling my proverbial guts and letting you know the things I think about you in my head. Ever. See, for a while now I’ve been crushing on you, and I’ve realized that in general I actually much prefer the dreamy crushing part to the stark reality of instigating/dating/relating/breaking up that will inevitably result if by some miracle of nature you reciprocate my tender yearnings. And let’s not even go into what will happen if you rebuff me with cavalier impunity, or even worse — let me down gently (ugh!).

To get paradoxical about it, until I let you know how I feel, our hypothetical relationship can be seen as either dead or alive or both, much like Schrödinger’s cat…

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Philippines Named ‘Most Stupid Country to Elect a 20-Year OJT as a Senator’ by Time Magazine

So, What's News?

Flag of PhilippinesMANILA, Philippines — The Philippines has been named as Time’s “Most STUPID Country to Elect a 20-Year OJT as a Senator”.

“The overwhelming victory of a self-professed on-the-job trainee-cum-Senator in the recently held election in the Philippines cemented the country’s fate,” wrote Time’s news director Marilou C. Martin.

She added, “Falling for the diversionary tactics of an inexperienced candidate that saw her steer the issue away from her credibility to her skin complexion to make herself look like the underdog; gave us no choice but to bestow such title to a country, who was destined for greatness before the elections.”

“And yes, we intentionally all-capped the word stupid for added emphasis,” according to Martin.

Time gave special attention to the country’s 11,789,643 registered voters (as of press time) who voted for Nancy Binay, as contributing to the country’s “overall stupidity rating index”.

“These are probably the same 11,289,648 people who had no…

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